Unity Consciousness & Bioneuroemoción®
Before our birth we are already exposed to a family environment and environment, from which we inherit genetic, epigenetic and psychological information, where our identity is formed and our process of unconscious individuation begins to develop.
This process is produced by outside influences, usually our parents are those who by means of very subtle processes shape us, these consist of reinforcing or punishing certain behaviors, for example:
children must be strong and dominant and girls must be feminine and submissive, thus reinforcing certain beliefs and behaviors according to these definitions relating to gender, making us identify from very young with what the environment classifies as good and thus reject the bad, thus initiating the creation of our “ego” and “shadow”.
This is how we educate ourselves and learn to hide under our threshold of consciousness (a way of believing that things are) the unacceptable characteristics of our family environment (which constitutes our angry or alienated “I”) showing only those supposedly good aspects (which they constitute our “false SELF”) in order to be accepted by that family environment, and it may happen that from childhood we feel that we will never be able to achieve family expectations, thus becoming since child the complainants of the projections of our shadow, as a “black sheep”.
As it would be the case of a man of irreproachable behavior that his son is a thief and his daughter a prostitute, both roles with implications of social judgment, thus making them carriers of the family shadow. From small we are impregnated of all this family history NOT EXPRESSED in the family history (grudges, hatreds, taboos, secrets, murders, incest, abortions … ..) although NEVER HAVE MADE explicit mention to it.
If we really work with our shadow, the unconscious wounds of the family can show us a path to balance, instead of considering them from the ego’s view, as simple wounds that awaken our bitterness and desire for revenge, allowing us to evolve our consciousness. Facing the intergenerational family shadows can help us to redeem the history of the family, although for this the first step will be to identify the excesses in the behavior of our parents.
The SHADOW of the PARENTS:
The intense and prolonged experience with our parents and family (their struggles to claim attention or power, pacts, secrets, resentments, etc.) will profoundly affect the unconscious expectations we expect from ourselves and our subsequent relationships. These expectations are usually shared by the family, which allows us to speak of a “shadow or family unconscious”. If for example within the family we are accustomed to occupy a certain status, we will have the unconscious tendency to aspire to occupy that same level in the social environment in which we find ourselves transferring it to our friends, jobs, couples, etc.